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Tips On Enticing, Impelling and Inducing Others

There are definite benefits to being persuasive. After all, every child care provider must sell their services to prospective clients.
 
Not only that, but we must induce employees to do better, impel creditors and bankers to offer better terms, entice children to listen and learn, and persuade our significant others of the correctness of our wants, needs, desires and ways.
 
Below are practices consistently employed by the extremely persuasive.
 
They make personal connections.
 
Persuasive people know that they can be easily dismissed if you have no emotional investment in either them or their position. So they strive for likeability and seek commonalities and shared goals to help create emotional bonds . They are non-adversarial and show empathy for your position, letting you know they are "on your side". They are never impatient, knowing they will invaribly be asked to express their position once they have created the connections that assure others of common goals.
 
They are excellent listeners.
 
Persuasive people know that it takes more than convincingly articulating their position (which they must assuredly be able to do) to effect change in others. They put as much effort into listening as speaking. They listen to gauge receptivity and to learn what specific objections must be resolved. They also listen for areas and items of agreement and capitalize on those moments of consensus. Persuasive people are not in love with the sound of their own voices, they want to listen to you not themselves. They already know their position and realize they can't persuade without knowing yours.
 
They pick their battles.
 
The most persuasive people practice restraint. They save their powers of persuasion for matters of importance, rather than exhaust them trying to control minor details of little to no consequence. They realize that constantly trying to convince people to accept or do something breeds defensiveness and resentment. Persistent agressiveness backfires, while the person who rarely asks, gets consideration when they advocate ideas or changes.
 
They never deny facts.
 
Persuasive people never argue facts. They welcome strong opinions and give full credit to any argument that has validity. By acknowledging the credibility of your facts and opinions, they know you in turn are likelier to respect the positions they put forth, and their merits.
 
They provide gratification.
 
A smart persuader will give you what you want whenever possible. He wants to find the easiest path to you saying yes, so he won't "sweat the small stuff" and will make sacrifices to aid his cause. He knows that not every battle needs to be won to win the war. Persuasive people give ground where they can, holding ground only when it is crucial. They choose to be successful rather than being right.
 
They know when to be quiet.
 
Truly persuasive people know that wearing people down with never-ending verbosity is an ineffective strategy. They will support their position and ask questions that lead to closing the conversation. They know that the best thing to do after asking a closing question is to shut up. You will either agree or provide the objection(s) they need to resolve in order to achieve agreement.
 
They know when to back off.
 
Great persuaders bring you along at your own pace. They make their case using the tips above and then "walk away", giving you the time and space for careful consideration. They know that nothing can rival you persuading yourself of the merit of their position and they know that seldom happens in their presence.
 
These tips on persuasion fall into the "more bees with honey than vinegar" category. That's because people respond to respect. Think of the last time you were sold something or persuaded to take a particular action. Was it by an agressive barrage of "tough sell" techniques or a combination of the methods mentioned here?
 
 

 

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